If only life was this simple, sigh!!

What i would give to have instincts like those.

I hate mondays!!!

I know that garfield was the first to say these very words but i echo them nevertheless. In IITM a monday is the worst day of the week as :-

1. i would have stayed up till 4 in the morning as is my usual ritual during weekends. I know its not normal but hey im not normal either (depends on your viewpoint on what is normal and what is not...would publish a post on normality pretty soon) or i might be suffering from a severe case of extended permanent jet lag.
2. We have a full day + workshop.

A typical monday schedule would look like this:-

7:00 - alarm rings ( snooze it )
7:05 - ""
7:10 - ""
7:15 - ""
7:20 - reset alarm to 7:45 (there's still some time left)
7:45 - wake up ( HOLY CRAP!!! 7:45!!!)
7:46 - brush, fart, etc (run, run, pant, pant )
7:50 - bath
7:56 - read newspaper (i still have 4 mins )
8:04 - Run, run, jump, run, cycle, cycle, fly, cycle, run, run, search for a comfy place to crash
8:11 - sleep
8:50 - wake up ( huh?? where am i? ) nd shift class

repeat crashing and waking up for the next 3 classes

11:50 - go to mess and eat the multicoloured hydrocarbons they serve.
12:30 - change into workshop clothes (conductor uniform ) complete physics problems for the next class
1:00 - go to physics tutorial and search for a comfy place to hide from the prof ( am i having deja vu?)
1:55 - cycle to ws
2:00 - 4:50 - try not to fall asleep and try not to burst out laughing at the prof's slogan language!!
5:00 - midnite - fart (for non-iitians reading this post, totally not what you are thinking) , grub (yipeee!!! hydrocarbons rule!!! ) , fart again.
midnite - more fart
2:00 - crash

repeat process!!

Naughty little Santa

I saw this while i was supposed to be mugging for ID110. Enjoy!!

Santas warned 'ho ho ho' offensive to women

Santas in Australia's largest city have been told not to use Father Christmas's traditional "ho ho ho" greeting because it may be offensive to women, it was reported Thursday.

Santa Clauses have instead been instructed to say "ha ha ha" instead, the Daily Telegraph reported.

One disgruntled Santa told the newspaper a recruitment firm warned him not to use "ho ho ho" because it could frighten children and was too close to "ho", a US slang term for prostitute.

"Gimme a break," said Julie Gale, who runs the campaign against sexualising children called Kids Free 2B Kids.

"We are talking about little kids who do not understand that "ho, ho, ho" has any other connotation and nor should they," she told the Telegraph.

"Leave Santa alone."

A local spokesman for the US-based Westaff recruitment firm said it was "misleading" to say the company had banned Santa's traditional greeting and it was being left up to the discretion of the individual Santa himself.

The female species

For years we have heard that the female species is very much different anatomically than the male ( google for "female + body" and you'll see my point!! ).
Evolution has made the female body very much different from the male body.
Apart from the most observable accumulation of fat at certain parts of the body, I realised today that females have another less observable feature in their bodies.
When I was a kid, I have heard a lot of jokes about fat wives nagging their husbands continuously and wondered whether females do really talk that much.
Today life has bestowed upon me infinite wisdom. I have realised that females do talk that much and a bit more.

As I was sitting in a classroom filled with pumps, valves and all kindsa plumbery (Is that a word?? if not, I am going to copyright it), staring at a lot of squiggly lines supposed to be circuits, I heard a small noise which you don't hear often at IITM. A female voice!! But what blew the beauty of the moment was that the creature kept on emitting that beautiful frequency for more than an hour non-stop.

Like the ancient saying goes, Even a beautiful song heard a hundred times in a row, becomes a dumb song.

I have concluded two ground breaking inferences from this experience.

1. All jokes are based on solid facts (at least part of the joke is)
2. females must have really strong jaw muscles to be able to keep them moving all the time.

Now what was the whole point of this blog entry?? There was no point!!
But in life most of the interesting experiences come from pointless experiences. Alrigh!! I'll stop blabbering for now but I promise you I'LL BE BACK. Mwah hah hah!!!